Saturday, January 15, 2011

Recapturing romance

This Saturday I'm grateful for date nights

Lately I've been yearning for those days when Mr Samoa and I were dating. Butterflies in my tummy, thoughts consumed by him all day.
I know, I know. That's not what marriage is about...feelings.
But just a little of those feelings is good to have sometimes. You know, just a little more...zing, for want of a better word. And I'm not talking about sex.

We're coming up to our sixth wedding anniversary in a few months.
We've been together seven years in total now.
And I have heard of the seven year itch. Yikes!!!

Not being with Mr Samoa has never been an option. The D-word (divorce) is not in our vocabulary and goes against everything we stand for.
But I can see how people with different values and beliefs would go looking elsewhere when the feelings go walking. 
Like in the movie Eat, Pray, Love. I'm not a fan of it.

In these times, we choose to love and say those loving words and we know that soon the feelings will follow.
But we have decided to be a little more proactive in our date nights and inject a bit more romance into our marriage.  
I volunteered to organise the first night. So I got my mom to babysit and we set off on our romantic adventure.

I took him to Mount Eden that has lots of lovely cafes and cute shops. But we didn't do the usual and go out for coffee or dessert. I told Mr Samoa to pick the thing he would most like to eat or drink and get it takeaway.
He chose a chocolate milkshake! I, of course, got a coffee, a mochacino to be exact, and a piece of chocolate mouse cake. Yum!

Then I took Mr Samoa to the top of Mount Eden. We sat wrapped in each other's arms, drinking in the beautiful sunset, looking for landmarks, chatting about nothing and enjoying each other's presence. No kid-talk was allowed.
It was different and it was simple. Yet it was exactly what we needed.

Nights like these are going to become a regular occurence in our marriage.And we don't even have to leave our house. Candles and dinner in the garden? 
Since having Smiley, these nights taken a back seat.
We're so darn tired and busy.
But I don't want to be wishing for more in our marriage.
I want to make it happen instead.

We also realised we had different definitions of what romance was. Any guesses for what one of Mr Samoa's definitions was?

If you've got any different, simple ideas for recapturing romance, please leave me a comment. I'd love to hear them!

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Felicity said...

What a special, special post.
I love that you are so proactive and your values are wonderful.
You seriously made me smile when I read about your date night and the photos are just lovely.

It is wonderful to have discovered you via Maxabella's,

Felicity x

Maxabella said...

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.

I love these words and you are so right. That 'zingy' feeling does fade, but some wonderful times together like you have made will certainly keep the spark alive.

We have regular date nights and then thing we do from time to time is just go to a pub and play some pool and have a couple of beers. Just like we used to do on a lazy Sunday afternoon. It's uncomplicated, fun and does the trick for us. I adore my husband and I still miss him every minute that we're apart. Corny, but true. x

Little Kiwi Chick said...
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Jacki said...

Great post! We're going to make more of an effort with date nights this year too! Thanks for setting such a beautiful example!

MNM's said...

Yay for you guys! Good on you for making the effort to recapture the things that brought you together in the first place. It is ALWAYS worth it! We also started doing fortnightly date nights on Friday towards the end of last year and it worked really well. Even just at making us sit together on the couch and cuddle while watching a movie rather than being buried in our laptops. It's so hard with kids to find the time, but ya gotta do's an investment in our long-term future togethers hey!

Muddled Up Mumma said...

Such a great post. I am visiting Auckland next month and will now remember this when I take my husband up the top of Mt. Eden!! Great to have found your blog.

katef said...

What a lovely post....
I've been trying to make more of an effort to simply reconnect on a daily basis. We've been married for ten years and four kids and there are patches when things are not so flash, but always, if we just put in a little effort things come good...

Becky said...

Lovely. Before hubs and I got married we promised to have a date night once a month. It never happened!
Sounds like you had a beautiful night.

Anonymous said...

What a great post! I think we should all do something similar. The last time my partner and I had 10 minutes out alone was our anniversary (and I think it was the first time in about a year). Think I'll make a concerted effort this year to have a date night every month.

Jules said...

Lovely post, so romantic and the sunset looks beautiful!

Maybe you could make up ideas for dates taking turns using the maybe A for apple picking, B for baking together or something like that. I read about it in a book ages ago and thought it was a cool idea, but just haven't got round to putting it into practice yet!

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